Terms Negotiable

FOR LEASE: One precocious yet tempestuous four-year-old girl.

Has been known on occasion to crank call 911. And then deny it.

All Hail The Queen

Finn: "Oooooh, I can't wait to see that new Alice in Wonderland movie! There's going to be so many cool battles, and swords, and bad guys, and good guys and...."

Shea: "And PIGS!"

A Wolf In Girls' Clothing

This morning, after her bath, Shea was sitting on the bathroom floor toweling off and babbling to herself. After a minute or two I overheard her shouting (in a mock alarmed tone), "Security! Security!"

So I popped my head in to investigate.

Karin: "What are you saying, Shea?"

Shea: "Security! Security!" she replied, with an impish grin.

Karin: "Do you need help with something?"

Shea: "No."

Karin: "Well, that's kinda like calling for help. Do I need to remind you of the story of the Boy Who Cried Wolf?"

Shea: "Huh?"

After telling her the story, which in my version ends spectacularly with the wolf chomping the boy whole after none of the villagers came to his lying-ass rescue, her face turned from concerned to cynical.

And then she shouted right past me, louder than before:

"Security! She's telling phony stories!"


.

Cutting To The (Not So) Quick

Scene: Dinner table.

John still working. Karin and Finn both finished with their meals, while Shea flexes her champion stalling muscles by firing one question after another to nobody in particular.

Shea: "Why do we eat rice?"

Shea: "Why do we get wreaths?"

Shea: "Why do we sing?"

Shea: "Why do we have vineyards?"

Shea: "Why do we use forks?"

Shea: "Why do we...

Finn: "...TALK SO MUCH?!?"

Aspirations

Shea, at age 4 1/2, wants to be when she grows up:

"An airplane flier (a pilot) and the guy who takes the tickets at the movie feeter."

Just so you know.

Preschool Crafts To Thrill You

Our Resident Lexicographer

Shea: "Mom, I'm very, very, very, very, very FRUSTRATED."

* beat *

Shea: "Mom, what does frustrated mean?"

Dethroned

Let's face it: Shea's a lovely girl, but girlfriend can be kinda bossy. Especially with her patient, indulgent older brother.

But even Finn sometimes gets fed up. Like he did this morning.

Shea: "Fiiiinnnnnnn, come in here and fix the TV for me!"

Finn: (No response. Keeps working on his Sodoku puzzle.)

Shea: "Fiiiinnnnnnn, come help me!"

Shea: "Fiiiinnnnnnn, come over here right now!"

Shea: "Fiiiinnnnnnn, you need to do this for me!"

Finn: "It's not like you're my QUEEN or anything, so I'm not going to!"

Bloom

Yin And Yang

Once again, my children remind me of their polar opposition on most topics:

Shea: "Mommy, ______ got a time out in school again today."

Karin: "Oh no. Have you ever gotten a time out in school, Shea?"

Shea: "No."

Finn: "Me neither!"

Karin: "Good for you guys. It's not cool to get in trouble in school; it's a waste of everyone's time. So remind me again: Why do we go to school?"

(Blurting out their answers at the exact same time:)

Finn: "To learn."

Shea: "So we won't go to jail."

Self Awareness

Karin: "Shea, that was really nice of you to share your chocolate milk with Baby Kui."

Shea: "Yeah, I'm getting nicer."

First Day Of Her Last Preschool Year

Second Grader

Spanky Lives

Apparently tired of taking turns, today Finn took a thick, black permanent marker from the art supply box and attempted to carve out some boy territory for himself by repeatedly inscribing "NO GIRLS" on the grove of strawberry guava trees in the backyard where he and his sister regularly play.



He was promptly scolded for being a repeat vandal (last week he got busted for writing on his closet door and who can forget this doozie?), and sent to his room for a little cool-down time.

And guess who ended up playing in the trees after all, just before we scrubbed off all the offending graffiti before it set into the bark?

Four Faces of Four

Seems like I was just doing this, but holy smokes -- our baby turns four today!

Sometimes She Reminds Me Of Stevie Nicks

2008 In Photos

2008: The Year in Photos

In January the kids got buckled into the car for school, backpacks and lunchboxes in hand -- Shea, for the first time.

In February the kids got spoiled all kinds of rotten.

In March the kids and I climbed up Diamond Head together.

This is the view from about halfway up.

In April, still getting used to the whole concept of preschool, Shea cried through most of her Easter parade. Afterwards, her brother comforted her.

By May, Shea had long-since figured out which of Finney's friends were the cute ones and flirted accordingly.

In June, we posed for a family portrait in our backyard because I needed to submit something for my 20-year high school reunion brochure. 20 years.


In July, while visiting California, the kids got to wear fun hats in a photobooth at Frankie Dino's 6th birthday party.


In August Finn kept a keen eye on the competition at his school's jog-a-thon.



In September the kids watched The Red Balloon on my computer, wearing next to nothing and loving it.



In October John showed Shea how he shaves every morning.



In November we all watched history being made by someone who can actually bodysurf Sandy's.


In December I actually talked Shea into wearing a dress AND a hat.
Which she wore for about 10 minutes.


Here's wishing you a fantastic 2009!

Shea Wrote Her Name For The First Time On Christmas Eve

She Calls It Her Cookie Bake Oven

Today's Swimming Lessons